ZanPackard.com
The Adventurous Introvert ™ Founder of Women Alive! ™
Zan Z. Packard, M.A.
The Adventurous Introvert ™
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Monthly Newsletter:
The Journey Within
Newsletter
The Why of It All
by Zan Z. Packard
" Be careful what you ask for."
Sound advice for sure. How many times have you worked for something, gained it, only to find out it didn't really make you happy? "If I only had....then I could be happy." We all know the pitfalls of being careful what we ask for.
A friend once laughed that she dreamed and schemed for a big beautiful house. Her intent was so strong that she, in fact, got her house. To her horror, instead of the house being her dream, it became an overwhelming burden of maintenance. What she didn't realize was that she wanted the house for all the wrong reasons.
The dream didn't match her core values.
Now there is nothing wrong with wanting a big, beautiful house, but when she and I looked at her personal reasons (her "why's") behind her dream, it became evident that they were all externally driven. She was looking for something or someone to give her value. They had little to do with who she was and what her core values were. It was no wonder the house gave her little of what she was looking for. She was looking outside for meaning and purpose when she should have been looking inside to her values.
Then how do you know what it is you really do want? This is a huge question that must be asked. If you are to realize your dream, especially your Premium-Dream, you need to be sure you want what you are asking for. You need to make sure it is a good fit for who you are, and especially for who you were meant to be.
If you know or don't know what your Premium-Dream is, this is an activity that is a must for you before you go any further:
Look at all the things you wanted and gained in your life. Go back to when you were first formulating your dream and identify the original reason for wanting it. Hopefully you've already done your Core Values exercise, and based on those, look and see which 'whys' fit into your values. When your goals matched your values, I'm guessing that they were a dream that was satisfying. If they didn't align with your values, then my same guess is that they left you feeling less than happy. Like something is missing, not quite right, and thus left you still searching.
Values are who we are, not who we would like to be, or think we should be. They represent our unique and individual essence, our ultimate and most fulfilling form of expressing and relating to our world. They are, in fact, our compass to guide us as we choose our realities.
As you begin to build your Premium-Dream in your mind, even before you take action, look to see how it aligns with your core values. This is the first test that must be passed. As you formulate your dream or passion, also know which value it is satisfying. That will tell you if and when you are truly on your right course.
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